Adventures in Nursing
"On the day I got my tooth, I had to kiss my Great Aunt Ruth. She had a beard... and it felt weird." - Courtesy of Larry the Cucumber
Last week my sweet daughter finally got her first tooth. And, let me tell you, it definitely makes for a blog-worthy story.
I returned home from work, and my dear smiling husband handed her to me saying "There is a razor sharp tooth sticking out of her gums. I felt it with my finger!"
Okay, sweet husband... you felt it with your finger?! Really? Well, thank you for that enthusiastic announcement, because now I get to nurse the child with the razor blade tooth in her mouth. What joy! What elation! *Please note these last two sentences were written with a large amount of sarcasm* (Although I'd been looking forward to her finally getting a tooth, I had been incredibly freaking out about what that means for me... her nursing mommy. There are just some parts of a person's anatomy that should NOT GET BITTEN!)
Here's a quick rundown of how our first few hours of baby-with-tooth nursing went: (if you're squimish, feel free to skip to the end.)
To my delight, her first couple feedings that day went quite smoothly and I barely noticed she had a tooth... but then it came time for bed, which Mia generally dislikes anyways... and out came my devil child.
It went something like this: CHOMP! "OUCH! No, Mia, we don't bite mommy, that hurts." And I preceded to calmly sit her on the floor all the while hoping that I wasn't missing any necessary body parts. Phew... she hadn't broken skin. Good. But now she was sitting on the floor screaming her head off because I wouldn't pick her up and feed her.
Then 2 minutes later, trying to cease her mournful and angry cries, I tried again.
Attempt number two: CHOMP AND CLAMP! "OUCH!!!!! Mia, NO, we don't BITE MOMMY!" I quickly broke the clamp with my finger, and sat her on the floor where she decided to once again begin her outrage. I looked enviously at my husband who was joyously watching something on tv and pretending like nothing was amiss. (Eye roll) I mean seriously, he has an absolute cow everytime Mia gets a twinkle in her eye when his shirt is off and she sees a nipple, but do I get ANY sympathy for trying to nurse razor mouth??!! But I digress.
It was time to try again.
I mentally prepped myself for a bite the third time, in hopes I wouldn't screech so loud to scare some more cries out of Mia... so...
Attempt number three: CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP! I let out a tiny yelp and calmly said, "Okay, baby girl, I guess you're not hungry." And I put her down on the floor, and quickly followed that with giving her a toy or pushing her towards Andrew for some distraction to cease the wailing.
We eventually got her to go to sleep just fine without nursing, and her night feedings went well because she was too sleepy to bite or to care about me screeching if she did. But apparently her short term memory is beginning to function quite well, because boy was she mad at me the next day.
I came home from my morning shift of work as usual, and I expected (per the normal routine) to find a rather hungry baby who was ready to nurse. But each time I picked her up, she turned away, cried angrily and wiggled to be released. Apparently, my sweet baby girl had decided to be as stubborn as both her parents. She was on a nursing strike, and she was having NOTHING to do with me when it came to food. It took a loooong 2 or 3 hours and her being very sleepy from a nap before I could convince her that nursing did not mean I would yell and put her on the floor again. Thank God the internet has a ton of info on teething and nursing strikes or I might have gone a wee bit mad.
And here we are a week later. And all is well that ends well I guess. The tooth hasn't pushed through too much more, but everything is mostly back to normal now. She's learned not to bite, and she gave up on her strike after a bit more coaxing. I'm really hoping this isn't an "every time a new tooth comes in" pattern, but at least I've had a little experience now.
Man... mommyhood is such an adventure. Just when you think you've got a skill all worked out, the baby goes and grows up a little more. Sigh.
"And we must always remember that the separation of church and state was meant to protect the church from the state, not the state from the church. " - Senator Sam Brownback
I thought it was an interesting quote and possibly fodder for discussion. What do you think?
In honor of the 4th anniversary of my blog...
I'd like to bring you one of my posts from my first month of blogging. Comment as you will:The Strataa theory by Kristi
In observation and experience of the world of coupledom, I have developed a theory of why certain people date certain other people. The Strata is a theory of general societal attractiveness. It is based mostly on superficial qualities. Basically, a person is most likely to date another person IF and ONLY IF that second person fits in the first's same general attractiveness level. This theory is not black and white or unnegotiable, but it can be seen most obviously in examples of EXTREME cases. Rarely do you see a tall lean cleancut man dating an overweight, less-than tidy woman. In the same way, a supermodel woman with long flowing blonde hair will in most cases not be seen dating a greasy-haired, big-glasses scrawny man.
The Strata can actually be seen in much more subtle terms as well. You often see "intelligent" looking people together, "athletic" people together, "chubby" people together, and "alternative" people together. Some would say that this is based on those people's personalities... which is perhaps the case. But I think overall, people, especially women feel much more comfortable approaching men that do not look too far out of their strata. Men, on the other hand, tend to go after women in much higher strata.. and then they develop the "good guys finish last" complex. (Which believe me, I will most certainly have a commentary on in the near future).
Okay that's the basics of the strata. Many people will argue with this theory, but most research you can do will pretty much confirm it. There are few exceptions to the rule. My disclaimer: Just because I think my theory is true does not mean I think it is right.
Memories of AHS
Stole it from MySpace... needed a new blog... thought it looked fun.
High School Memories
1. Who was your best friend? Kay
2. What sports did you play? I managed Cross Country
3. What kind of car did you drive? A black Ford Tempo
4. On a Friday night what were you doing? Playin in band at a football or b-ball game, or hanging out at Brandon's house or Joel's house
6. Were you considered a flirt? I don't think I got that stigma until college
7. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir? yes, yes and YES
8. Were you a nerd? most definitely
9. Did you get suspended/expelled? no
10. Can you still sing the fight song? I don't think it had words, but I can probably play it on my trumpet.
11. Who was your favorite teacher? Mr. Atkinson, Mr. Jones
12. Where did you sit during lunch? Um... at the tables where my class was designated to sit mostly.
14. School mascot? Indians
15. School Colors? Black and Gold
17. Did you go to Prom? yes... 3 times
18. If you could go back and do it again, would you? Yes. High school was a blast.
19. What do you remember most about graduation? That my cousin Zack (though extremely sick from Chemotherapy go to walk with us.
20. Where did you go senior skip day? I dont' think my class had one... or I at least didn't skip.
21. Favorite memory? Pretty much all of Senior year and being in love for the first time.
22. Were you in any clubs? Language Club, Scholars Bowl, NHS, SADD, Band, Drama
23. Where did you go most often for lunch? The cafeteria
24. Have you gained some weight since then? yes.
25. Who was your Senior prom date? Joel
26. Are you planning on going to your reunion? DEFINITELY
27. Who was your homeroom teacher? Mr. A
29. Who was your high school sweetheart? Joel
30. Do you still talk to people from high school? By email and sometimes phone and sometimes at Church
31. Did you win prom queen or king? Nope but I have pictures with my Junior yr and Senior yr Kings
32. Where did you work in high school? The Warren Theatre
33. What were your grades? All A's until the last week of my senior year when I bombed my Calculus final and cried for about 3 days.
34. What year did you graduate?1999
Okay, does anyone else have a song that when it comes on it makes them want to pull out their hair? I do. And I shall share it with you now.
Benny and the Jets by Elton John. Seriously... I know this guy is a "Sir" and all that stuff, and he's like a major part of music history, but come on... this song is SOOOOOOO annoying.
It's like having a little brother trying to get his big brother's attention. "Benny.... Benny... Benny... Benny." It's sooooo whiney and icky and like nails on a chalk board. P - YooK
If you like the song, I pity you and your ear drums and anyone who has to be around you when you listen to it.
On the other hand, I have a new favorite song.
Has anyone heard that new song by Bon Jovi, "Make a Memory"?? I love it. It sends me off to La-La Land. There are very few songs that do that. "Crash into Me" by Dave Matthews is one of them. "I'll Be" by Edwin McCain used to do it, too, but then Joel and I broke up (7 years ago) and now that song kinda makes me feel icky (sorry, Joel). In fact, almost anything by Edwin McCain is a yucky song to me now. Poor Edwin McCain.
Speaking of songs... in Journalism school we once had a professor who taught us about "Driving Songs". She said these were the songs that motivated us. It had to do with journalism because those type of songs were great songs for commercials. Anyways... she asked each of us to figure out what our driving song is. Wanna know what mine is? I don't really care what you just answered, because I'm going to tell you right now.
It's "All Star" by Smashmouth. It totally gets me motivated. My favorite verse is:
"Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Head to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb. So much to do so much to see. So what's wrong with takin the backstreets. You'll never know if you don't go. HEY! You'll never shine if you don't glow. "
And that's all I have to say about that.